Confessions of a hopeless romantic

“Never expect, never assume, never ask, and never demand. Just let it be. Because if it’s meant to be, it will happen the way you want it to be.”
– Unknown

Love. It’s every little girl’s dream. We can thank the fairy tales and Disney for that. 

Almost all of us are scared to admit that we want to find love. We’re scared to admit that we want cheesy romances like, kisses in the rain, slow dances, carriage ride at night, kiss on the top of a Ferris wheel, slow dance in the rain, mistletoe kiss and yada yada yada. We think it’s lame and embarrassing that we all want that. When in reality, we all want it.

I’ve never been in love. It’s sad, I know. But, I’m hanging in there. I know some day love will find me and it’ll be an awesome story. Maybe not as awesome as pumpkin carriages, a ball, a glass shoe and happily ever after. But, eh, it’ll be my own love story.

It’s just that waiting a long time for something can get antsy and frustrating. There a few moments where I’m jealous of couples standing before me, or I scoff at any sight of pda. Don’t even get me started on Valentine’s Day. I may fake a smile or laugh but deep down the green-eyed monster is getting the best of me. At night, and sometimes during the day – pretty much all the time – I wonder why the love bug or cupid or fate hasn’t coupled me up yet. Is there something wrong with me? Am I not doing something right?

I feel hopeless sometimes. I just need a sign, like finding a penny on the ground, or a four leaf clover or a rainbow across the sky, anything, anything that will restore hope and keep me from giving up.

I know being with someone doesn’t define who I am or isn’t what life’s about. But, love is special, and meaningful. I want to know firsthand what love feels like. I want know how special it truly is.

My problem is that I’m always thinking about it. I keep building this picture in my head of how I’ll meet the love of my life or how my first kiss in the rain would go. I keep going over and over it, like a movie that hasn’t aired yet. My problem is that I want it real bad, so much more than anything. I should just be patient, and wait until it is time for cupid to shoot me with his little arrow. 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s