Quotes from my Journal

Inspired by Thought Catalog, I decided to share a couple excerpts from my journals. Hope you enjoy the randomness of my scattered mind. These quotes are from my current journal. I’m too lazy to get my older ones. Later on, I’ll share quotes from my older journals. But, until then…enjoy!

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“I hate it when I’m hungry and my stomach does this, like, crescendo of growls.”

November 17, 2014 

“It was beautiful. The quietness and empitiness and solidarity gave (college name) an aesthetic I never noticed before.”

November 17, 2014

“Damn you wind! Damn you for blowing debris in my eye!”

November 19, 2014 

“And now that I feel this dream slipping away slowly…I just can’t let it go…even though life’s taking it away from me…”

November 25, 2014

“It was super cold today. But, I shouldn’t be surprised because it’s November. But, with this bipolar weather that’s been happening lately – I’m not really sure what’s what.”

November 26, 2014

“Right now, at this current point in my life, I don’t know what’s going to happen to me. My future is unclear, and it looks kind of dark.”

December 4, 2014

“This is my problem, when I act I don’t think about the future. How it’s going to effect it? I just do it – self destruct, as if everything will be the same when I build myself up again. But, when am I going to learn that that’s not how life works. Especially when you’re an adult. Actions have consequences.”

December 4, 2014

“I can’t wait for Wednesday! I’ll be free from this madness.”

December 9, 2014 

“I have crossed the finish line. It doesn’t matter if I came out first or last.

December 10, 2014

 

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Let’s Talk about Journaling

To me, reading through old letters and journals is like treasure hunting. Somewhere in those faded, handwritten lines there is a story that has been packed away in a dusty old box for years.

-Sara Sheridan

Journaling is a perfect way to express yourself; let go of negative and positive emotions; remember important details of your life that will be forgotten; to be more creative, and gain more perspective in life

For the past two years, I have been a hardcore journaler, I have completed about 9 journals so far, and am on my 10th one right now. I even created sub journals for different categories. I have a listography journal, which is journaling through list making; a gratitude journal, writing the things I’m grateful for everyday; a novel journal, writing about my progress in my novel; a tv show journal, writing about thoughts and opinions on tv shows; and an art and collage journal.

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Writers should have a journal because it allows them the opportunity to write everyday. It’s an effective way to eliminate procrastination from your writing life. And if you’re a writer you know that procrastination is a writer’s worse enemy. Journaling allows you the opportunity to write as freely and messily as you want, there are no grammar or punctuation rules. There aren’t deadlines you need to adhere to, there aren’t any word count goals or page count goals. There are NO rules! You can write one page on one day, and then two pages on another day, you can even write 13 pages the next day. You can write whatever you want, anytime you want.

Also, journaling allows you the opportunity to find yourself, contemplate your thoughts about the day, or a situation that puzzled you. And who knows maybe those thoughts can lead to future projects like a story, or a poem, or a book.

It can be like an inspirational playground with your material.

And that’s my stance on journaling for writers.

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Why I think you should have a journal?

Why not have a journal? It’s a place for you, and your thoughts, feelings, emotions, memories and yada. A journal is a place for you to explore who you are, what you think, what you feel, and what you have to say. It might be comforting to write a journal entry on a day where the sun just isn’t shining, or on a day where everything isn’t going your way. It is a better alternative to bottling things up, or letting it go through self destructive ways. When I’m having a bad day, I write it down in my journal – sometimes those pages go on for, like 13 or more pages because I’m writing it all down and just letting go. It helps clear my head, and helps me become more honest with myself and what it is I’m really feeling. And if someone pisses me off, I write it down in my journal, it helps calm the part of me that wants to lash out on the person.

Another reason why journaling important, is because of the big and little memories inside them. Don’t you love memories? I know I do. A photograph is great because you can visually see it, and it brings you back. But, haven’t you ever looked at a photograph and not remember when or where it was taken? Or why it was taken? Or what you were doing when it was taken? You have this nice beautiful photograph and you don’t have any memory of it. All you have is this picture to tell you it happened. What about the details? Aren’t details important?

But, journaling is a different story because you’re writing details down. Details that are descriptive and specific that can pain a picture of what it was you were really seeing. You write down what you saw, heard, touched, did and even felt.

It’s the perfect place to store your secrets, or innermost desires that you aren’t comfortable sharing with the world. Think of it as a safe haven for your private thoughts and feelings.

Just think about how nice it would feel to read your journals when you’re older. I was reading my older journals and I had a lot of laughs at how random my mind was, and how overly negative I was in school. Imagine what it would be like to read what past-you wrote 10 years ago. ‘Cause trust me, the way you think now will be different from the mindset you’ll have in the future.

And journaling helps you articulate what you feel and why you feel it. So, basically it be like a therapy session with you and your self. Doesn’t that sound…therapeutic?

 

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Here are the Reasons Why I Journal

  1. It clears my mind, especially during times when my head feels so cluttered and foggy.
  2. It’s freeing. I can write anytime I want, I can write about anything I want. And I can write as much as I write. There are no rules.
  3. I don’t have to self-disclose appropriately.
  4. I can be 100% honest with myself…and there’s one person in the world I need to be honest with, it’s myself.
  5. It’s the perfect place to store things I find interesting like magazine ads and cereal box cutouts or letters.
  6. Memories. I love going back and rereading my old thoughts.
  7. More affordable than a therapist.
  8. Those moments of self-discovery.
  9. Perfect way to alleviate stress, that doesn’t involve hurting myself or anyone else.
  10. Those moments when I’m bored and I doodle. Doodling is the best.
  11. It’s the best way to engage in intrapersonal communication. I can talk to myself without actually talking to myself.
  12. Those moments when my sense of humor shines.
  13. I never have writer’s block. Because all I’m doing is writing down what I feel.
  14. Speed writing. There are times when I finish two pages in less than 10 minutes.
  15. Venting for as much as I want without sounding obnoxious and obsessive.

 

What College has Taught Me

“It’s a long road but, it’s worth it.” – Unknown

             School is stressful. It’s really, really stressful. But, at the end of it all, the only thing that matters is what you learned from it. What you can take from the course, 1 or 5 years from now. College isn’t just about passing classes and getting a diploma; it’s a place to discover your passion. Once you discover it, you go out into the real world and you fight for it. In LaGuardia, there are a few classes that are teaching me things that are useful in my future. Those courses were challenging, but it made me stronger, better. I can honestly say I’ve learned the most from those classes.

            In Art, I’m not Picasso, but I’m getting better at it. My drawings are surreal, very abstract, but it’s nice and interesting. I never thought I could be able to draw 3 dimensional things, but now that I’ve done it, I know I can now. It feels good to know that. In English, that professor had me stressed out most of the semester. Handing out English assignments after English assignments, which is weird that I’m complaining because I love writing. But, I feel like she’s helped me find my voice, figure out my writing process. Before, I felt like I never had a voice, or at least a strong one. My writing process or plan of attack was getting everything done at the last minute (For the record: I’m one of those procrastinating writers). In Math, which has always been my weakest subject since birth, I still don’t know logarithms, or what exponential value is, and I’ve failed practically all exams. I guess, I learn that not everything is easy and if I want to learn something I have to work at it. It’s taught me to not give up, and that it’s okay to make mistakes, but it’s better to fix them and try again.

                So, even though school was stressful the past couple months, it was worth it. I guess it’s because I’m taking something out of it. I’m becoming a newer, better version of me, which is something I’ve wanted for a very long time.

Confessions of a hopeless romantic

“Never expect, never assume, never ask, and never demand. Just let it be. Because if it’s meant to be, it will happen the way you want it to be.”
– Unknown

Love. It’s every little girl’s dream. We can thank the fairy tales and Disney for that. 

Almost all of us are scared to admit that we want to find love. We’re scared to admit that we want cheesy romances like, kisses in the rain, slow dances, carriage ride at night, kiss on the top of a Ferris wheel, slow dance in the rain, mistletoe kiss and yada yada yada. We think it’s lame and embarrassing that we all want that. When in reality, we all want it.

I’ve never been in love. It’s sad, I know. But, I’m hanging in there. I know some day love will find me and it’ll be an awesome story. Maybe not as awesome as pumpkin carriages, a ball, a glass shoe and happily ever after. But, eh, it’ll be my own love story.

It’s just that waiting a long time for something can get antsy and frustrating. There a few moments where I’m jealous of couples standing before me, or I scoff at any sight of pda. Don’t even get me started on Valentine’s Day. I may fake a smile or laugh but deep down the green-eyed monster is getting the best of me. At night, and sometimes during the day – pretty much all the time – I wonder why the love bug or cupid or fate hasn’t coupled me up yet. Is there something wrong with me? Am I not doing something right?

I feel hopeless sometimes. I just need a sign, like finding a penny on the ground, or a four leaf clover or a rainbow across the sky, anything, anything that will restore hope and keep me from giving up.

I know being with someone doesn’t define who I am or isn’t what life’s about. But, love is special, and meaningful. I want to know firsthand what love feels like. I want know how special it truly is.

My problem is that I’m always thinking about it. I keep building this picture in my head of how I’ll meet the love of my life or how my first kiss in the rain would go. I keep going over and over it, like a movie that hasn’t aired yet. My problem is that I want it real bad, so much more than anything. I should just be patient, and wait until it is time for cupid to shoot me with his little arrow.